Mom jeans, scrunchies, turtlenecks, Birkenstocks, crop tops and denim skirts have resurrected from the ancient, abandoned boxes of our parents’ attic. Fashion has blasted back to the past. Chokers, particularly, happen to be on the lengthy list of relaunched trends.  

I’m ecstatic about ‘80s and ‘90s fashion making a highly anticipated comeback, but I draw the line at neck attire. Is a necklace no longer sufficient?  

It seems funny that wrapping a piece of fabric around a neck makes that individual any more stylish than someone lacking one. I just imagine the uncomfortable hold it must possess around a neck and it makes me cringe.

A handful of people pull them off, but chokers certainly do not fit with everyone’s unique style and people seem to forget that. The halls are flooded with students sporting the neckwear and the choker’s popularity has clearly risen in comparison to previous years.

A few weeks ago I attended a birthday dinner that called for formal attire. I agreed to pick up a close friend of mine who was also attending. I pulled into her driveway, music blaring, my fingers patiently drumming the steering wheel. Eventually my patience evaporated after 10 agonizing minutes had passed. Side note: I am not fond of being late, ever.

She plopped down in the passenger seat, clicking the car door close. I noticed her bright, floral top and jeans, which was nothing peculiar in terms of her style. I began to shift the gear into reverse and when I did, I did a double take. Around her neck was a thin, black knotted piece of string. I couldn’t help but study it for a few moments longer before asking in disbelief, “Is that a shoelace?”

Turns out, I was right, and she went on to proudly inform me the reason she was late was due to the fact that she had been scouring her room to find it. Her outfit would have been just as complete without it. I will at least give her credit for creativity.

A world full of people strutting down sidewalks with shoelaces around their necks is not my idea of an accessory. Pearls are meant for the ocean, laces are meant for shoes and necks are meant to be free.  Trends always blow over, and I am just anxiously waiting for this one to end.